Hatch Shell - 8"x10"

From Small Works

I knew there'd come a day, but I didn't think it would happen so fast into my little small works experiment here - a day when nothing works no matter what you do to it. So I'm breaking a TINY rule. I'm going to call this "not quite done". Of course, if someone wants to buy it, shee-it...I won't touch a thing. But I'm gonna break out some oil pastels as soon as this thing starts drying.

I was thinking about Boston today and ran across a photo my sister had taken of the skyline when I lived there (I believe it's from the Bunker Hill Bridge), so I decided to do a rough skyline painting. The sketch went in well, and then...the paint just piled. And piled. And piled. I had to take a rag and wipe some of it off, actually, and then about five minutes before my hour was up, I worked feverishly to get to SOME sort of point of "closure". I finished, and wasn't HORRIBLY upset with it, and went downstairs to get the camera. When I returned, I picked the canvas up...and it fell. Face down. It was already a bit "painterly", but it looked WORSE. So I got out an old tortillon (a rolled piece of paper that forms a point, sort of looks like a pencil but with no lead, just paper) and carved some lines in the paint. I decided to stop and then come back in later and use the oil pastels. I hate doing this, because I really want to make my brushwork stronger. I'm more classically and technically trained in drawing, so I feel like I'm taking the easy way out if I bust out the more drawing oriented tools, but at this point, whatever. I considered just trashing the whole thing, but I decided that I need to post this for my own good. When it dries and I do the oil pastel work, I'll post the final.

I guess it just proves - everyone has a bad day at work occasionally.

Paintings in progress

Some artists work exclusively on one piece at a time. I'd love to have that kind of concentration and dedication, but I just can't do it. I've got to have options on what to work on, I get frustrated with things, put them aside for a while, then come back when I have some fresh eyes. At any one time, I probably have about ten pieces in the works. Here's a small group of them:

This was actually a HUGE reworking of a painting that I was never crazy about. I don't think it'll ever go up for sale simply because it's an overpaint that I never did correctly. I still play around with it every now and then - it's been "in progress" for six months.
So far, this hasn't had a bit of paint associated with it, but this was an initial sketch from a picture I took of my "little" brother Blake. I'm a little iffy on the composition of it, the paper I drew this on is a lot more square than the canvas I want to put it on - it's hard to translate it onto a different space.
This isn't showing up as well as I'd like, the color is quite a bit off. I found the reference picture associated with this while looking through an old high school friend's myspace page, and I took a bit of creative license to it. Some days I'm ready to trash the whole thing and start over.

This had a lot of promise when I started... I found the reference picture - a friend had taken it of a poppy field in France - the same day my friend Claire told me the story of how she started her obsession with poppies. She was having a really rough time a few years back and was driving a lot between Knoxville, Tennessee, and Lynchburg, and one day, she was having such a hard time, she just pulled over to burst into tears about everything. When she finally looked up, she noticed that she hadn't even looked over on the side of the road, and right there was a huge, beautiful field of poppies. It hadn't been there the day before, and may not have even been there the next day, but she kind of adopted it as HER flower. I loved the story, and I think I might have kept it in my mind as I worked on this for a while. Unfortunately, however, the lighting has driven me a little crazy. I can't seem to give it depth. I'm going to pick it up and finish it pretty soon here.

I'm hoping to finish all of these BEFORE I move back home. I'll update as some of them get completed.

101 Goals in 1001 Days...

I'd love to say I just found this idea online, but I'll admit, I totally was stalking someone through a social networking site. I saw the list they had made of similar goals, which came from this site. If you're reading this and this looks familiar, S, thanks, and I'm sorry I kinda stalked your blog. I'll blogroll you if you see this, but I figured I'd err on the side of letting you have your privacy.

So, 101 goals. 1001 days. I don't even know what day 1001 days from now is, but I'll be 30 years old. I'd love to see anyone else's goals - and if you could be of any help in any of these, please let me know, I'd be happy to return the favor!

Taking the lead from the GRS site, I've categorized these.

Health & Fitness
1. abstain from smoking cigarettes for 365 days in a row.
2. complete a marathon
3. Eat exclusively organic for two weeks in a row.
4. Drink only water for one month.
5. See the dentist and have a clean bill of health twice in one year’s time.
6Do the neti-pot every day for six months straight.
7. Floss every day for one year.
8. Ride a bike 500 miles in one month.
9. Meditate every day for one year.
10. abstain from the tanning bed for 365 days in a row.
11. Get my eyes checked and obtain correct glasses and/or contacts
12. Work out every day for 60 days straight.
13. Do three chin-ups or pull-ups without assistance.


Home & Garden
14. Sell my old Insurance Books.
15. Find out if the microwave is fixable, If it is, fix it.
16. Refinish my wooden antique furniture.
17. Repaint every room in whatever house I live in.
18. Eliminate every “catch-all” junk drawer, basket, folder, bin and box in my house.
19. Plant and raise a garden, even if it’s a window garden.
20. sell my old clothes in the basement to consignment



Financial
21. Turn a profit in art and writing.
22. Pay my dues to my sorority for two years straight.
23. Donate 10% of one year’s income.
24. Pay every bill on time for one year.
25. Get my credit to where I COULD qualify for a home loan.
26. Balance my checkbook on the computer every week for two years.
27. Do my own taxes correctly, but have them double-checked professionally.
28. Save $1000 and don’t touch it until the end of the 1001 days.
29. Become 100% financially independent.
30. Buy one horrendously expensive purse with money that I have earned through art & writing after all that month’s bills are paid.


Personal
31. Get my grandmother’s story on paper.
32. Buy a Wii.
33. Learn to knit and finish one item.
34. Make a quilt.
35. Create and sew an outfit on my own.
36. Make something out of www.bitchyinthecity.com with Celeste.
37. Plant a tree
38. Walk into my favorite stylist and allow them to do ANYTHING they want to my hair.
39. Get on Jeopardy.
40. Design and make a gingerbread house.
41. Make every Christmas present I give without giving presents that suck or leaving anyone out.
42. Take a class on something I know little to nothing about.
43. Write down my life story.
44. Have a tasteful nude photograph taken while I like my body.
45. Train Colonel Mustard to walk off the leash without fear of him running into traffic
46. Meet Dolly Parton.

Self Improvement
47. Donate a day of time to a charity
48. Learn to write HTML & CSS code.
49. Recycle everything possible for three months straight.
50. Use non-disposable bags 50 times instead of plastic or paper.
51. Create ten recipes on my own.
52. Clean out my computer clutter and back everything up outside of the Time Capsule.
53. Give a wedding gift in the appropriate gift-giving window.
54. Learn to speak a foreign language.
55. Stop using a computer for one week straight (the work is still possible, just requires some forethought!)
56. Make a list of five things I am grateful for every day for a year.

Adventure
57. Take a day trip to New York by myself.
58. Hike a mountain.
59. Drive across the country.
60. See Paris, France.
61. Go to a foreign country by myself.
62. Go on a girls’ vacation.

Family
63. Have an argument with a family member without crying.
64. Send birthday cards to every brother, sister, aunt, uncle, cousin, grandparent, close friend and child of the above for one year.
65. Send my mother on a vacation to Greece.
66. Scan pictures of our childhood onto a disk for my mother, father, brothers and sisters.
67. Take all of my brothers and sisters to lunch at the same time.
68. Mow my mother’s lawn for free.

Entertainment
69. See all Oscar-winning movies for best picture.
70. Read the Bible, cover to cover.
71. Complete scrapbook of Italy and Greece trip
72. Go to a movie by myself.
73. Read 100 best book of all time

Professional
74. Update my art resume.
75. Copyright my existing work
76. Create a sculpture.
77. Write a business plan.
78. Create and print postcards and business cards.
79. Do creative sparks every day for a year.
80. Complete an Egg Tempera portrait.
81. Teach someone to draw.
82. Open an Etsy shop.
83. Create a mixed-media piece.
84. Take a figure drawing & critique class.
85. Complete series on quitting your job to do what you love.
86. Complete a self-portrait in oil.
87. Take a watercolor class.
88. Phase out crappy art supplies.
89. 50,000 RSS subscribers.
90. Publish something in a magazine.
91. Publish something in book form.
92. Sell a painting with no commission and no discount.
93. Organize and run a one-woman show.
94. Organize blog for effectiveness – put art on art, etc.
95. Start a business.
96. Print and frame a collection of 30 black and white photographs
97. complete and publish my website
98. Create 75 paintings of fine art – no commissions, no portraits.
99. Write a novel
100. Have my portfolio reviewed by a non-related professional whose opinion I value.
101. Meet every professional deadline for one year.

A clean environment makes a clear mind

After a weekend of cleaning and organizing, I attempted to get back to work while getting the last of the stuff on my list done. Procrastination is not an easy habit to break, I tell you.

I'm working on a couple of pieces that I need to finish before I even think about leaving Philly. It's kind of a tough thing - I know I'm going to still have work up here when I leave, and with gas having jumped 15 cents in the past week with no end in sight, I guess I'm going to be eating a lot of expenses when I'm gone. It's amazing how much you expense when you're working for someone else, but when you're working for yourself, you'll do anything to avoid spending what little money you've got "invested." I put that into quotes because in reality, I'm investing everything I make back into further work. Anyway, I started a couple of things that I'm hoping to get done within the next couple of days so that I can get it off my mind at the very least.

I have a gift card with an art supplies website that I have avoided spending for quite some time. First of all, I usually need art supplies the EXACT day I buy them - I run out to buy something when I discover I'm out of it. With pastels running at $5 a stick, oils upwards of $50 a tube, and paper at $2 a sheet, it adds up...especially when I feel like I waste a lot of materials on stuff that will never see the light of day. Second of all, the website in which I have the gift card is a bit more expensive - leading to a bit of a pickle. Do I spend the giftcard on stuff that I KNOW I could get cheaper locally? Or do I save it for a time when I might find a deal with them? I have no idea.

Aaaaannd now I feel like I'm rambling about nothing. I think I'm in a funk. SOMEone, get me out of it. I need some good news.

Procrastination Update: T-minus 36 hours or so

I tried to get a little done last night, but there was the whole is-it-the-Judd-I'm-thinking-of saga going on. And I think I'm getting sick. But here's my progress:

5. Write my assignment for the other website I write for - an essay on "I have never been more drunk than that night..."
-I'm about 3/4 of the way done. It's a little long, so editing will take some work.

7. Get my friend April a baby gift - any suggestions?
-homegirl's set. In case she reads this, I'm not posting what it is.

12. Find the $20 I got out of the ATM the other day.
-I found my receipt that has convinced me I already spent it. Darn it.

I'm sick, but I'm going to Cowboy Up.

But for now, I'm going across the street to Whole Foods to get whatever bee-pollen-mystic-hippie smoothie sludge that might help me get through this.

Anyone have any suggestions? Symptoms: my throat started feeling bad yesterday, then my lungs started hurting and now I have congestion. Doctors are for quitters.

Portraits, Part Two...

I decided to work on portraits yesterday and today and got a few things done. I got a few things done, one of the biggest being that I got the commission I was working on completed. I called
the mom of the subject, hopefully she'll come by as soon as possible to pick it up, and more importantly, pay what's owed.

I also worked a lot more on Caroline's...I'm still working on it, but here's an update:


It's weird how much you actually DO have to see the subject in real life to get it right, or at least "good enough." I'm still working, there's a couple of things that I'm holding off until as late as possible since it's what's going to say "okay THAT's my kid." For now, though, it's progressing about like it should.

Finally, I've been working on this, which is based on a picture taken in 1972. One of my biggest problems has been that I left myself few options for properly composing it - I either am going to have to crop off part of the guy on the left or part of the guy on the right, and most likely, parts of both. Kind of a bad thing composition-wise - to have to crop out elements on the left AND right - but I suppose I can manipulate it a little better once I get it on a bigger drawing board or just on a bigger surface.


I'm still working on this one too - the third guy from the left's head is too small, the guy on the right isn't looking how I want him to look, and the child is barely even sketched in. I've got a lot of work to do. I'm not commissioned on this one, it was started during a class I took a while back, then I decided to go a different direction.

I've got some more posting to do today on the art stuff, so stay tuned...

"A Portrait is a painting in which something is always wrong with the mouth" - John Singer Sargeant

The above quote is by one of the greatest portrait painters - ever. Kind of describes my work sometimes.

Lots of artists consider portraiture to be a "sellout". Personally, I don't care, you can find an artist out there who will consider ANY money-making activity involving art to be selling out. I do portraits because I'm good at them, because there's a demand for them, because they seem to be a dying breed, and most importantly - because I enjoy doing them. I love photography, but there's something about an artist's portrait that captures what a photograph never can - personality, charisma, and inner qualities that can't be summed up in a split-second exposure onto a photographic plate. I got into it rather oddly - my grandmother (my primary art teacher) hasn't ever really done portraiture, and I considered portraits to be out of range of my talents and education. When I was in the 8th grade, I was given a sketchbook and a subscription to Rolling Stone Magazine for Christmas. On a lark, I drew a few portraits based off of covers from Rolling Stone in pencil. It was 1994, and Kurt Cobain's suicide and the "fall of grunge" (or whatever it was called) called for dark, black and white portraits and photojournalistic styles. I discovered that I could pick up and translate value and shape well, and honed my drawing skills doing portraits throughout high school and college. I'm sure my mom still has those old drawings, the only ones I can remember now are that of Kurt Cobain, Courtney Love, River Phoenix and Jim Morrison...man, teenage angst at its finest.

Since then, I've branched out a little, incorporating those portraiture skills into other media, namely pastels and charcoal. While I love my "other stuff" - what might be on the Fine Art side of my work - I genuinely like doing portraits, especially of children. I had my own portrait done twice growing up, and I'm fascinated by portraits by other artists - the aforementioned Sargeant, Andrew Wyeth's Helga Pictures, Jamie Wyeth's incredible depictions of Rudolf Nureyev, even Andy Warhol's Marilyn Diptych - actually meant as a statement of mass-produced art - they all kind of speak of the subject, the artist and the viewer, all at once. Only the very best photographers can ever hope to accomplish this.

For all that I love it, however...it's a stressful part of my work. Parents and subjects know themselves and their children better than I ever will, and people paying for commissions have a tendency to think that the subject is....shall I say...better-looking...than an artist may depict. One of the reasons I love what I do is that it's very difficult for someone to say that my work is "wrong" or "bad" - critique is possible, but an artist who knows the rules breaks them with beauty. I can't really push that boundary with portraits. It either says "hey, that's Junior!" or it doesn't. I have never had a commission fall through for this reason, but it's stressful. Furthermore, traditional portraiture, in many ways, is a dying art. With simple photo editing software, one can create an artistically-styled photograph, complete with digitized brushstrokes and everything. I, and usually everyone else, can spot this kind of "portrait" a mile away, but it gets a little frustrating when clients will say "I want you to do it exactly like this picture here". Doing portraits from photographs alone is difficult, at best, and the artist is almost never satisfied. Andrew Wyeth, arguably the greatest living American painter, turned down Jackie Kennedy's request to create a posthumous portrait of the late John F Kennedy for this very reason. When his son, Jamie, was offered the job, Andrew cautioned him against it. Later, the elder Wyeth turned down an enormous sum of money when he declined to paint a portrait of Michael Jackson - simply because Jackson wasn't available for adequate sittings.

I wish I could have the ability to take this kind of stand, but...the Colonel needs to get fed, and bills have to get paid. So, on occasion, I will accept photograph-only assignments and commissions. I'm trying to improve my work done through photographs, so I've accepted two from college friends of mine.

My first is of Caroline, my friend Meghan's lovely tow-headed daughter. Quite the little diva, according to Meghan. I lived with Meghan for a year in college and we're still quite close - but Caroline's going on 3 years old and I've never met the child. I know, I'm a bad friend, but I've been living up North. I told Meghan I'd do Caroline's portrait way too long ago - so long I'm kind of embarrassed at how long it's taken. Work got in the way, blah blah blah. It's my gift to her, so I figure I can spend a little longer.

Here was my first attempt:



It was all right. The proportion was a little off, but that's pretty easy to correct. My problems lay in the fact that I should have used a bigger piece of paper to ensure correct composition in a frame, I needed to use better materials, and (here's the big one) - Caroline's a little too young here. Babies are great, but artistically speaking, they start looking like themselves somewhere around 2 years old at the earliest. This is still on my studio wall, though. It's all right I suppose.

My second attempt:

I'm not even going to show it, I am having camera battery issues, to say the least.

This was intended to be a pretty quick sketch, then Oprah sucked me in and I did this for a couple hours in front of the TV. I used the wrong paper here - as children have a "softer" look to their features, I needed a smoother paper. As a result, I couldn't pick up enough of the red in her mouth when I came back over it to blend and lift color. Not my favorite, I hate people even looking at this one.

Now I'm starting over from scratch. She's a little older and a little bit easier to pick her out of a crowd.

Here's the initial sketch:



Fear not, Meghan. It's just a base, it never looks like your kid at this point. Done with vine charcoal on Mes-Teintes Canson Paper, which is seemingly getting more expensive by the day. The shadow in the corner is my morning coffee, which surprisingly managed to keep itself off my work this time. I worked on it for a bit today and put it up when I got stuck. Part of the job is knowing when to walk away from the table for a bit. Kenny Rogers' The Gambler, as related to art...my friend Maverick swears that the answers to all of life can be found in that song, and I agree. It's very Taoist if you look at it.

I'm also working on a sanguine/red chalk and sepia portrait of Shaye's daughter Neely. Another tow-headed, bow-headed, all-around cute little kid. Shaye was nice enough to just give me the login and password to her snapfish account for finding reference photographs, which Neely seems to love posing for. My mom WAS a photographer, and I think most of the pictures of us have one or more of us looking pissed off about getting our picture taken. Sometimes I feel like calling my mom and apologizing for being such a pain in the keester.

But at any rate, this is what I have so far of Neely. I'm a little stuck on what to do with the background. If I can find some decent paper, I'm going to scrap it and try something new involving staining the paper with coffee or tea. Kind of a risk - the acidity in them will degrade the paper over time. But I figure it's worth a shot and I can let the archivists figure out what to do with my work when I'm gone.




I'm obviously still working on her face, homegirl doesn't really look like a China Doll. Comments and critique are welcome...after a scathing review of my portfolio this past winter, nothing hurts my feelings anymore.

PS: I would post reference photos as well, but don't feel that it would be appropriate. They're not my kids, after all.