Apparently I'm the last person on earth to hear of this, but I seriously just laughed until there were tears - TEARS - streaming down my face like a crested river through small Iowa farm towns.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
What does my dream mean?
I had the oddest dream last night that involved the following elements:
1. A plane that crashed shortly after landing. But we were all cool with it, and we were more concerned with getting to our destination (Myrtle Beach, SC for some reason - I haven't even been there since I was probably 13 or so) than with the fact that we had just crashed a plane.
2. A very crowded Burger King at breakfast. They didn't have any numbers on the menu for the value meals, and when I asked for my breakfast, I couldn't remember the word for "sausage" or "bacon" or "biscuits and gravy" - which I've never really had - and when I finally got it out by describing it, the people wouldn't take my order because they said I had to give them the number of what I wanted. There was also some sort of focaccia pizza that I kept calling Pizzacata, which is actually the name of a restaurant here in Philly - that doesn't serve pizza on focaccia/Northern Italy-style, it's served Neopolitan-style.
3. A midget. I don't know why, but the midget was there. This scares me, because I had a dream a couple of months ago that I had to go to someone's wedding with a midget as my date, and he was really mean to me. I didn't even like him in the least bit, but everyone thought he was the coolest person that has ever lived. I hereby apologize to the little people/dwarfism sufferers/vertically-challenged community if I've just offended, I don't know what the proper term is. His stature had nothing to do with why I didn't like him in my dream, he was just MEAN.
4. The city of Charlottesville, Virginia. I haven't been there in two years.
5. The people I went to Cancun with on Spring Break of my senior year of college. Ryan J, Natalie M, Traci R, Leslie C, and a bunch of guys from Traci's boyfriend's fraternity. I have no idea what was going on, but they were all there. With the exception of hearing from Traci every once in a while on IM/Facebook and Nat and Ryan being facebook friends, I haven't talked to any of them since I left UGA.
Anyone got any ideas of what this means? I was painting a very vivid, high contrast painting very late until when I went to bed, so I think my my mind thought it was in some sort of hallucinatory state.
1. A plane that crashed shortly after landing. But we were all cool with it, and we were more concerned with getting to our destination (Myrtle Beach, SC for some reason - I haven't even been there since I was probably 13 or so) than with the fact that we had just crashed a plane.
2. A very crowded Burger King at breakfast. They didn't have any numbers on the menu for the value meals, and when I asked for my breakfast, I couldn't remember the word for "sausage" or "bacon" or "biscuits and gravy" - which I've never really had - and when I finally got it out by describing it, the people wouldn't take my order because they said I had to give them the number of what I wanted. There was also some sort of focaccia pizza that I kept calling Pizzacata, which is actually the name of a restaurant here in Philly - that doesn't serve pizza on focaccia/Northern Italy-style, it's served Neopolitan-style.
3. A midget. I don't know why, but the midget was there. This scares me, because I had a dream a couple of months ago that I had to go to someone's wedding with a midget as my date, and he was really mean to me. I didn't even like him in the least bit, but everyone thought he was the coolest person that has ever lived. I hereby apologize to the little people/dwarfism sufferers/vertically-challenged community if I've just offended, I don't know what the proper term is. His stature had nothing to do with why I didn't like him in my dream, he was just MEAN.
4. The city of Charlottesville, Virginia. I haven't been there in two years.
5. The people I went to Cancun with on Spring Break of my senior year of college. Ryan J, Natalie M, Traci R, Leslie C, and a bunch of guys from Traci's boyfriend's fraternity. I have no idea what was going on, but they were all there. With the exception of hearing from Traci every once in a while on IM/Facebook and Nat and Ryan being facebook friends, I haven't talked to any of them since I left UGA.
Anyone got any ideas of what this means? I was painting a very vivid, high contrast painting very late until when I went to bed, so I think my my mind thought it was in some sort of hallucinatory state.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
My dad would have a field day with this...
Because he's always trying to get me to nail down a "plan". Like a five-, ten-, or lifelong plan. And I've always been hesitant about nailing down anything for years (or, in this case, 1001 days) because I know that I might change it. Who are we kidding here, anyone who has ever lived with me knows that I try on my entire wardrobe before going to the grocery store - change is inevitable with Molly.
Can I change my 101 goals? Just a couple of them, because there's some that I really want to be on there now. And a couple I actually don't really give a shite about, I just wanted that 101 when I was writing them.
Can I do it? And don't tell me "oh it's YOUR goals, YOU can do whatever you want"...because when I don't do them, I expect people to yell at me.
Can I change my 101 goals? Just a couple of them, because there's some that I really want to be on there now. And a couple I actually don't really give a shite about, I just wanted that 101 when I was writing them.
Can I do it? And don't tell me "oh it's YOUR goals, YOU can do whatever you want"...because when I don't do them, I expect people to yell at me.
When can you "dump" a friend?
First of all, don't worry, none of the people who read this blog are in danger of getting "dumped"!
I was catching up with a friend today that I hadn't talked to in a few years. No, she's not in danger either. Anyway, she asked me about a former friend of mine and how he was doing. I told her that I had chosen to stop talking to him a few years back, and her reply surprised me.
Her exact words?
"Wow Molly...I don't mean to upset you, but did you ever reconsider that? I know you always trust your gut and everything, but one of the things I admire about you is that you're very loyal to your friends. It just doesn't sound like you."
Wow.
I should back up and tell the story. This friend, who I won't name by name, and I had dated for a while in college. If he reads this, so be it - he probably should. Our breakup wasn't anything hairy or bad, in fact, we kept in contact for almost four years after that. He was even one of the first people to come visit me when I moved to Philadelphia. Neither of us ever wanted to get back together or anything, we were just good friends. However, when I went back to Athens, a mutual friend of ours told me something that was really disturbing - my friend had started dating a girl that had been married to one of his good friends.
I don't know the details of the story of how they started dating. Frankly, I don't really care. Even if the husband was cheating on the wife, if my friend waited until after the divorce to start dating her, whatever - the reality is that he owed more to his friend than to go after his former wife. I know, if she had been burned, she might need a friend as well and that might have been how they got together. But in my experience - and I've had a bit, coming from two divorces in my family, as well as two difficult breakups in my post-college life - even the worst cases of adultery or cheating are just symptoms of a relationship already gone down the tubes. Cheating, in my opinion, is simply a symptom of an already inherently flawed situation. People that are happy in committed relationships just don't cheat. I'm not saying that it absolves someone of it, but I think that his close friend deserved a little more than for his friend to go after his ex-wife. There's 2.5 billion potential partners on this planet - he should have picked another girl to date. Yeah, she's beautiful, I understand the temptation, I just don't think it was his place to burn his friend like that.
So. Yeah, I was surprised at him. I deleted him from my phone that night, and I was so upset about the whole matter, I called my mom the next day to ask if I had done the right thing. I may tell my mom what I'm doing, but I've never been one to ask her opinion on what I should have done. She actually agreed with me - that sometimes you have to take a stand for what you believe in, and if someone disappoints you in the way they treat their friends, you may not ever know when they may do something similar to you.
I thought about this today and realized that I still feel the same way. I don't know if they're still together, and again - frankly, I don't really care. They could have gotten married, have kids now, whatever. I hope they're happy, and I know that deep down he's either changed or he repressed some sense of integrity when he got into that situation. I don't think there's room for us to be friends again, I think that even if he came to me and said that he made a mistake and was sorry, I wouldn't feel any differently. Don't get me wrong, I've already forgiven him, but I think that he owes his friend the apology - not me. I think I had reason to "dump" this friend, simply because if one of my friends did that to me, I'd be extremely hurt. As for my friend's comment today, I know she meant well, I think she didn't really know the context of it all, but I think it still makes me a loyal friend - I just don't like giving that loyalty away when someone has been callous with that loyalty with their own friends. I'll admit - this is a bit different because he's NOT a girlfriend. If one of my girlfriends did the identical thing, I don't know what I'd do. We've all made mistakes, I know. But for the record, if any of my friends were to (God Forbid, and I've just knocked on wood) run off, leave their spouse and find another, I would be worried, first and foremost, about my friend. The spouse - they'll get support from their own friends and family. I would be concerned for my friend - if they had been going through rough times that I didn't know about, whatever - because that's my job: to be there for them when the world is not. I'm not married to the friend, after all, so they're not cheating on me. But if someone demonstrates - in a very big way - that they aren't such a good friend, then yes, it might cause me reason to reassess our own friendship.
Anyone think I did the wrong thing? Do you think that there IS a time when you can "dump" a friend - even when they haven't wronged you specifically?
I was catching up with a friend today that I hadn't talked to in a few years. No, she's not in danger either. Anyway, she asked me about a former friend of mine and how he was doing. I told her that I had chosen to stop talking to him a few years back, and her reply surprised me.
Her exact words?
"Wow Molly...I don't mean to upset you, but did you ever reconsider that? I know you always trust your gut and everything, but one of the things I admire about you is that you're very loyal to your friends. It just doesn't sound like you."
Wow.
I should back up and tell the story. This friend, who I won't name by name, and I had dated for a while in college. If he reads this, so be it - he probably should. Our breakup wasn't anything hairy or bad, in fact, we kept in contact for almost four years after that. He was even one of the first people to come visit me when I moved to Philadelphia. Neither of us ever wanted to get back together or anything, we were just good friends. However, when I went back to Athens, a mutual friend of ours told me something that was really disturbing - my friend had started dating a girl that had been married to one of his good friends.
I don't know the details of the story of how they started dating. Frankly, I don't really care. Even if the husband was cheating on the wife, if my friend waited until after the divorce to start dating her, whatever - the reality is that he owed more to his friend than to go after his former wife. I know, if she had been burned, she might need a friend as well and that might have been how they got together. But in my experience - and I've had a bit, coming from two divorces in my family, as well as two difficult breakups in my post-college life - even the worst cases of adultery or cheating are just symptoms of a relationship already gone down the tubes. Cheating, in my opinion, is simply a symptom of an already inherently flawed situation. People that are happy in committed relationships just don't cheat. I'm not saying that it absolves someone of it, but I think that his close friend deserved a little more than for his friend to go after his ex-wife. There's 2.5 billion potential partners on this planet - he should have picked another girl to date. Yeah, she's beautiful, I understand the temptation, I just don't think it was his place to burn his friend like that.
So. Yeah, I was surprised at him. I deleted him from my phone that night, and I was so upset about the whole matter, I called my mom the next day to ask if I had done the right thing. I may tell my mom what I'm doing, but I've never been one to ask her opinion on what I should have done. She actually agreed with me - that sometimes you have to take a stand for what you believe in, and if someone disappoints you in the way they treat their friends, you may not ever know when they may do something similar to you.
I thought about this today and realized that I still feel the same way. I don't know if they're still together, and again - frankly, I don't really care. They could have gotten married, have kids now, whatever. I hope they're happy, and I know that deep down he's either changed or he repressed some sense of integrity when he got into that situation. I don't think there's room for us to be friends again, I think that even if he came to me and said that he made a mistake and was sorry, I wouldn't feel any differently. Don't get me wrong, I've already forgiven him, but I think that he owes his friend the apology - not me. I think I had reason to "dump" this friend, simply because if one of my friends did that to me, I'd be extremely hurt. As for my friend's comment today, I know she meant well, I think she didn't really know the context of it all, but I think it still makes me a loyal friend - I just don't like giving that loyalty away when someone has been callous with that loyalty with their own friends. I'll admit - this is a bit different because he's NOT a girlfriend. If one of my girlfriends did the identical thing, I don't know what I'd do. We've all made mistakes, I know. But for the record, if any of my friends were to (God Forbid, and I've just knocked on wood) run off, leave their spouse and find another, I would be worried, first and foremost, about my friend. The spouse - they'll get support from their own friends and family. I would be concerned for my friend - if they had been going through rough times that I didn't know about, whatever - because that's my job: to be there for them when the world is not. I'm not married to the friend, after all, so they're not cheating on me. But if someone demonstrates - in a very big way - that they aren't such a good friend, then yes, it might cause me reason to reassess our own friendship.
Anyone think I did the wrong thing? Do you think that there IS a time when you can "dump" a friend - even when they haven't wronged you specifically?
Getting my money's worth out of $75 in (mostly) organic food
I went to Whole Foods last night to invest in food to start my little toxic cleanse...
Yes, that's what $75 buys you these days in Organic Foods. Only about 3 or 4 things were not organic, and except for the bananas, all of the produce is local. I could still knock part of that out by going to the Farmers Market (or accepting Sarah's offer of produce when I get home - never had it, but from what I remember, her house is quite possibly the closest thing to God's personal farm that you'll ever see!), so I actually think I shopped pretty well. Yes, I could have done without the $7 frozen pizza, the $6 crab & artichoke dip, the $9 gallon of protein juice-y stuff, and baby bananas at $1.99/lb when the real ones are 79cents/pound, but...baby steps, people, baby steps. Plus, that whole chicken is organic - and local - and actually cost LESS than a comparable chicken next door at Superfresh, not to mention it's a bajillion dollars less than buying the cut-up, skinned and de-boned chicken. For dinner I had a huge salad, and I couldn't even finish it because I was so full. I'll see how well I do in keeping this up.
Anyone have ANY idea how to cook a whole chicken? No, not going to do beer-can chicken. We only have bottles of beer, and if I were to buy one can of beer I'd have to buy a whole case. Welcome to Pennsylvania's stupid liquor laws.
Yes, that's what $75 buys you these days in Organic Foods. Only about 3 or 4 things were not organic, and except for the bananas, all of the produce is local. I could still knock part of that out by going to the Farmers Market (or accepting Sarah's offer of produce when I get home - never had it, but from what I remember, her house is quite possibly the closest thing to God's personal farm that you'll ever see!), so I actually think I shopped pretty well. Yes, I could have done without the $7 frozen pizza, the $6 crab & artichoke dip, the $9 gallon of protein juice-y stuff, and baby bananas at $1.99/lb when the real ones are 79cents/pound, but...baby steps, people, baby steps. Plus, that whole chicken is organic - and local - and actually cost LESS than a comparable chicken next door at Superfresh, not to mention it's a bajillion dollars less than buying the cut-up, skinned and de-boned chicken. For dinner I had a huge salad, and I couldn't even finish it because I was so full. I'll see how well I do in keeping this up.
Anyone have ANY idea how to cook a whole chicken? No, not going to do beer-can chicken. We only have bottles of beer, and if I were to buy one can of beer I'd have to buy a whole case. Welcome to Pennsylvania's stupid liquor laws.
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
IT COULD BE A CRACKHEAD! I'ma git a backho and uproot dat tree. I want the gold!
I am posting this with the tag "art" because my favorite part is the sketch. Actually, professional police sketch artists aren't much better, so I don't know why they put "amateur" on there.
Paintings in progress
Some artists work exclusively on one piece at a time. I'd love to have that kind of concentration and dedication, but I just can't do it. I've got to have options on what to work on, I get frustrated with things, put them aside for a while, then come back when I have some fresh eyes. At any one time, I probably have about ten pieces in the works. Here's a small group of them:
This was actually a HUGE reworking of a painting that I was never crazy about. I don't think it'll ever go up for sale simply because it's an overpaint that I never did correctly. I still play around with it every now and then - it's been "in progress" for six months.
So far, this hasn't had a bit of paint associated with it, but this was an initial sketch from a picture I took of my "little" brother Blake. I'm a little iffy on the composition of it, the paper I drew this on is a lot more square than the canvas I want to put it on - it's hard to translate it onto a different space.
This isn't showing up as well as I'd like, the color is quite a bit off. I found the reference picture associated with this while looking through an old high school friend's myspace page, and I took a bit of creative license to it. Some days I'm ready to trash the whole thing and start over.
This had a lot of promise when I started... I found the reference picture - a friend had taken it of a poppy field in France - the same day my friend Claire told me the story of how she started her obsession with poppies. She was having a really rough time a few years back and was driving a lot between Knoxville, Tennessee, and Lynchburg, and one day, she was having such a hard time, she just pulled over to burst into tears about everything. When she finally looked up, she noticed that she hadn't even looked over on the side of the road, and right there was a huge, beautiful field of poppies. It hadn't been there the day before, and may not have even been there the next day, but she kind of adopted it as HER flower. I loved the story, and I think I might have kept it in my mind as I worked on this for a while. Unfortunately, however, the lighting has driven me a little crazy. I can't seem to give it depth. I'm going to pick it up and finish it pretty soon here.
I'm hoping to finish all of these BEFORE I move back home. I'll update as some of them get completed.
This was actually a HUGE reworking of a painting that I was never crazy about. I don't think it'll ever go up for sale simply because it's an overpaint that I never did correctly. I still play around with it every now and then - it's been "in progress" for six months.
So far, this hasn't had a bit of paint associated with it, but this was an initial sketch from a picture I took of my "little" brother Blake. I'm a little iffy on the composition of it, the paper I drew this on is a lot more square than the canvas I want to put it on - it's hard to translate it onto a different space.
This isn't showing up as well as I'd like, the color is quite a bit off. I found the reference picture associated with this while looking through an old high school friend's myspace page, and I took a bit of creative license to it. Some days I'm ready to trash the whole thing and start over.
This had a lot of promise when I started... I found the reference picture - a friend had taken it of a poppy field in France - the same day my friend Claire told me the story of how she started her obsession with poppies. She was having a really rough time a few years back and was driving a lot between Knoxville, Tennessee, and Lynchburg, and one day, she was having such a hard time, she just pulled over to burst into tears about everything. When she finally looked up, she noticed that she hadn't even looked over on the side of the road, and right there was a huge, beautiful field of poppies. It hadn't been there the day before, and may not have even been there the next day, but she kind of adopted it as HER flower. I loved the story, and I think I might have kept it in my mind as I worked on this for a while. Unfortunately, however, the lighting has driven me a little crazy. I can't seem to give it depth. I'm going to pick it up and finish it pretty soon here.
I'm hoping to finish all of these BEFORE I move back home. I'll update as some of them get completed.
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